A Grain of Wheat

I always secretly thought it was a bit odd that Christians would say they had a life verse. "My life verse..." they would prattle on. "I would never have a life verse!" I thought smugly. "I mean, how could I? There are simply too many good ones! How could I isolate just one?!??" Besides, often enough God was doing different things in my life and He used different Scriptures to speak to me in those moments. Not to mention I simply didn't want to join the ranks of people who claimed to have a theme to their lives. (forgive me please, if you are one!)

Then one day (a good 13or 14 years ago now!) I heard Him say, "there's your life verse." I burst out laughing! Really! Right there with my cup of coffee, pen in hand and my Bible open. It's a wonder I didn't spill my coffee all over the tender pages! I can hear myself argue back, "but I don't want a life verse!!" He was silent. I laughed it off. Besides, if I'm going to have to have a life verse, for pete's sake don't pick THAT one!! This verse read, 
 "Truly, truly, I say to you, unless a grain of wheat falls into the earth and dies, it remains alone; but if it dies, it bears much fruit." John 12:24 

Good grief! I would have to be crazy to pick that verse!! How about a little Jeremiah 29:11? Can I have something nice like Philippians 1:6? And that's when I realized. I wasn't doing the picking. I was not assigning myself a life verse. God was.

Nevertheless, I ignored Him. I simply pretended He didn't say it. I still want to go back and search my journals to see if I recorded it or not. I went on my merry way. I forgot. God didn't.

Later we found ourselves overseas serving as missionaries. Some of the greatest moments in my life happened there! And...another low one. I lost another baby. The details of this loss have their own overseas horrors, but alas, this is not the place for that story. I found myself humbled and searching my Bible frantically, where was that verse? Something about a dead piece of grain? 

When we returned to the States, I finally fully embraced this verse. I used it for my email address, for my profile name in multiple online communities. I began to live out the verse. I was the grain of wheat in the verse. God was asking me to die to myself. Fruit will come from my life when I die to myself. 

Little did I know all He had planned for my life. Through dying to what I thought my life was supposed to be about, I have discovered His true purpose for me. I thought one thing, but He so lovingly had another plan. It requires me to daily die so He may bring forth this beautiful fruit. 

...And so I don't laugh at people anymore who have a life verse. Go verse-embracers!! 
(But sometimes, I wonder how they got to pick theirs and I didn't!) ;)

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